Good morning Team! I hope you are all having a lovely Sunday and relaxing.
As I promised here is part 2 on my journey through the covid-19 pandemic. I will mention that this second part is more about my feelings and how I felt emotionally so sorry if you find this too deep. I will start off by saying how much I know that my situation was not as bad as many people but still didn't stop me feeling the way I did... As time went on through this crazy time I learnt to accept it was okay to feel the way I was feeling and that I wasn't being selfish. So here we go.... Part 2 baby!
where I left off from the other was where I was talking about how I was doing some work in the pack house ti make the time go quick and also to earn a bit of money on the way. This actual saved me in so many ways and made my time go quickly and keep my mind of things.
I will now go back to the first couple of weeks I was in New Zealand... Yes I wasn't happy to be home and yes it hurt me that I felt that way. at the time I didn't know exactly why I was feeling this way... well I knew I wanted to be back in Adelaide but there was so much more behind me feeling that way that I didn't end up finding out till 1 and a half months into being home. In the end yes getting ripped away from my new life in Adelaide absolutely sucked and I was missing my friends there, I didn't know when I was going back and this hurt me the most.... if you know me you know I like to be organised and have a fair idea on what I am doing. so this really got to me and I didn't realise how much it was until later down the track. Another factor that was getting to me and I struggled hugely with was being back in NZ but not being able to hug or see my family... this was probably the most weirdest experience I have ever been through. I felt alone and I had never felt like this before.... once again most of you who know me know that I am a positive person and can find a positive in a negative pretty easily.. well not this time and this really scared me. i had to make a choice, I had to either keep dwelling on what was happening and feel worse and worse or I could choose my attitude and go with the situation.... I chose to choose my attitude. I will tell you now that it didn't feel better over night but things did look up and I things did get better.
As the weeks went on things started to fall into place... I booked my flights back to Australia and to me this was what made me feel better as I had a date I was going back. Finally by a month and a half of being in NZ I was starting to enjoy it and I really appreciate the time I had left with the family before I was going to head back.
Those first few weeks I felt like I was a visitor in my own home... if you had asked me in those few weeks why I would of said it was the family making me feel this way... but now I look back and it was ME. I was the one making myself feel that way, it was my head space, my mindset, my family was doing all they could to make me comfortable and they gave me all the support they could. But I also had to allow myself to feel like this as it was apart of how my mind was coping with the whole situation.
By the end of the 2 months I was emotionally, physically and mentally exhausted. This two weeks quarantine I am having to do as we speak is a blessing in disguise, I am super grateful for this incredible 5 star hotel room I am being provided with, it has a beautiful view, huge space for me to continue my training and i am getting my meals provided and all free of charge! I am so grateful to the Victorian government for this amazing service they are providing and the staff at the hotel. I am grateful for this time to reflect and recharge before I get to go back to Adelaide and l continue to live my dream and be able to help people be the best versions of themselves.
This whole situation as crazy as it has been I am grateful for it. It has made me realise how lucky I am to be able to do what I do every single day. I have always been taught to look at the positives in life and that there is always a positive in a negative no matter how big the negative may seem.
We will look back at this and realise that this whole pandemic was a positive as it gave us humans an opportunity to have a close look on how we are living our lives.
I will once again say I know my situation was no where near as a bad as a lot of people and that I was super lucky to be able to go back to NZ and be in a safe environment with my family. But it doesn't mean that I wasn't allowed to feel the way I did. We get told so much in life that we need to just suck it up and get on with things or she will be right! kind of attitude. But I will tell you right here and now that it's okay to not be okay and to let yourself feel.. do not hold it in.. talk to people or write it down, trust me its better then bottling it up.
I know this blog has been a bit all over the show but thats what blogs are about, they don't need to have a certain structure they are what you want them to be.
What I took away from this experience:
I want to live a nice life and be able to do epic things but also I want my life to have a certain amount of SIMPLICITY.
I am super grateful for what I get to do everyday by helping people be the best I can be.
Adelaide is where I want to be for now.
I am super grateful for the love and support I have around me.
If you ever need to talk I am here no matter if you know me or don't I am always here to listen and help where I can.
My next blog will be leading more into the topic along the lines of fitness, and in this certain topic I have a huge passion for and believe that it's a very important part of our weekly training schedule. It was a part of my training that took me a long time to finally nail... well I think you can always better yourself in all aspects of life but I do feel that I am doing a lot better in this area.
Have a fantastic Sunday and remember rest, relax and recover.
Chat soon,
Krista :) xx
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